This was to be my prep race for Ironman Switzerland which is in early July, that said, I’ve not done a Middle Distance race before, so it still represented a huge challenge.
My training has been going well, I’d started in mid November and had 3 solid months before I started having minor leg niggles that wouldn’t go away, and as a result I haven’t done anywhere near enough run training, which is especially disappointing as it is by far my weakest discipline. Despite this, for once, I had been very sensible and nursed myself back to fitness, so I was going into the race pretty much injury free.
Aware of how soon IMCH would be upon me I wanted to use this as a proper prep race , to throttle back and to feel as though I could continue once I’d finished, rather than seeking out the medical tent as usual. So I took all timing off the Garmin and left just Heart Rate (although I still had distance on the bike comp) for someone as OCD as me this was very scary. But I was determined not to go out too quick on the notoriously fast bike course and blow up on the run.
So for once I had very simple objectives.
Not miss the start of the swim
Bike to 135bmp
Run to 142bmp this would include a 9.30min run 30sec walk
Finish uninjured and fresh (ish).
The 5.15 start time meant an overnight stay in Lyndhurst which was about 20 mins away from Bucklers Hard. It was slightly disappointing to find a Wedding in full flow when we checked in at lunchtime on the Day before. I suspected that this would mean a Disco interrupted sleep.
After checking in we set off to register and attend the race briefing, all of which went smoothly apart from failing to meet up with Bopo and Ian, who’d attended the earlier briefing. The only thing that concerned me was the talk of the “harmless jellyfish”. – I don’t like jellyfish.
Registration complete and we headed back to Lyndhurst for an early, pre race Fish and chips accompanied by a couple of pints of local, flavoured water. The agreed meet time at reception was 3.00am. So I set the alarm for 2.15 and hit the sack at 8.00.
I’d like to blame the disco for my lack of sleep but in reality The Fear had travelled down south for a little seaside break, and was constantly whispering “encouragement” into my ear. a generous estimate would be, 2 hours sleep. I was however rewarded by the early start, as we met up in reception we were met by the sight of about 40 or so of the wedding guests who were still “celebrating”, the look of disbelief on their faces, when we told them what we were up to at that time of the morning was memorable.
As we left the Hotel the predicted wind and rain made an appearance, and by the time we arrived there was a full scale storm going on, I was surprisingly unconcerned by the weather.
An uneventful trip to race HQ saw us among the first to arrive, so we bagged plum racking spots (un numbered racking) As I was heading over to a marquee to get changed and shelter from Hurricane Swash, I spotted Gary and Ian queuing for the loo, after a brief chat (not bad for me at that time of the morning) I wandered off, I quickly turned around again at a commotion originating from bops portaloo, it was rocking around violently, and from the sound of it, Bopo far from having athe OMPF I think it was more a OMFP. My suspicion was that The Fear, having done his work on me the previous day had decided to pay poor old Bops a visit, at the most inconvenient time.
The Swim 2000m 40min 19 sec.
Objective one achieved! a bit too successfully though as one of the first in I found myself at the front of the start and had to paddle backwards to get behind the start line, by now there were loads of peeps behind me so no way through, I’d just have to take my chances at the front. Oh no, this is begging to look like my Windsor cluster all over again, surely I can’t make the same mistakes again.
The plan in river swims in to get in the middle, to take advantage of the flow on the way down then hug the bank on the way back, where the flow is “minimal”.
It all started very well, a bit congested but nothing to bad, in fact I found everyone very respectful, so when the was contact, rather than having a fight there was a parting of the ways, all very civilised. There was massive congestion at the first turn, but anticipating this I took a wide line and cruised unhindered around the outside. Now head over to the bank, all is well. Afer a while the flow began to take it’s toll, a quick look up showed that not only was I mid stream but I was now cut off from the bank by a load of parked boats, how the fook did that happen. The channel I was now in was not very wide and quite busy, I was being pushed nearer and nearer the floating Gin Palaces. As I passed one of the bigger ones, I saw, scrawled in graffiti along the side, Flava was ere.
The second lap was an exact replica of the first, I’ve still now idea how it went so wrong, but there were no Jellyfish and I really enjoyed it.
T1
I opted to de suit imediatley after I got out of the water, which went surprisingly well. Then a walk up the frankly, alpine 400m climb, to transition, for me there would be no gain in running. Because of the weather I opted to put a long sleeved top over my tri suit for the bike (good choice), as a result not my quickest transition but I didn’t forget anything, so happy.
The Bike 80km 2hr 39min
What a course, I loved it. Pancake flat and uber fast. Could I control myself though that was the question. I started off very conservatively and just got onto the Tribars to try and combat the wind, I was soon picking off plenty of the better swimmers. As the first lap progressed I started getting my HR to the top end of my target, I still felt great and was really enjoying it. I was drinking plenty and having a gel every 40mins.
As I waded my way up the field the peletons became more noticeable, and the only time I lost control was when some tosser shouted a sarcastic nice wheels as he went past. The fact he’d been sat on my back wheel for the last 15 mins didn’t seem to bother him. I let him go but kept him in sight until we reached a long straight slightly uphill section, I wound it up so I passed him at nearly my max effort, there was no way he’d be able to respond quick enough to grab my wheel again. A bit childish maybe, but I allowed myself a little bit of fun because of the restraint I’d been showing.
I’d heard how many bottles were lost at the cattle grids, but man alive there were dozens of them. I also saw the residue of a crash, I don’t what happened but it was getting very heated, I noticed that there was a DQ for dangerous riding.
Just as I was nearing the end of lap 2 and turning for home, come across Bopo, who’d obviously had a very good swim. Then a short pootle home, it was all over far too soon, 2nd objective achieved HR 133. I loved this bike route and am coming back next year to race it properly.
T2
Smooth, quickish.
The Run 22km 2hr 40min
Well this is where I was hoping I would be rewarded for my patience on the bike. As I started off, I felt strong, but I just couldn’t get my HR down, it was around the 155-160 mark much, much to high for me to do this comfortably. I tried slowing down but it still stayed high, I was soon as usual being passed by everyone I’d overtaken on the bike and it wasn’t long before Bopo caught me and did his best to drag me along, but it just wasn’t happening and after a quick chat his butterfly adorned arse disappeared off into the sunrise.
Shit as it was, I still didn’t feel to bad after the first lap, my run walk routine seemed to be working ok and I wasn’t getting too depressed by the huge numbers passing me. But as you complete the first lap, you have to go up Alpine hill through transition and onto the 2nd lap, this killed me and things started going downhill from here.
By now the wind was gusting and in typical fashion was into your face whichever way you turned. The inclines that I hadn’t noticed on lap 1 now become really testing, the run walk had gone from 9m30se-30 to 9min -1min, my pace slowed, my HR remained high and I was hurting. By 16km I really was miserable. I’d had enough, I wanted to not only give up, not only that, but I wanted to give up Tri totally, “why do I keep putting myself through this shit, I hate running and I’m useless at it”.
But in some perverse way it was from this low point that I managed to get going again. I started counting to 100, over and over again, mundane, boring but it took my mind off how bad I was feeling.
Eventually I approached the bottom of Alpine hill which you have to go up to finish. I’d managed to ahem time my walk time to coincide just short of this so I could have a breather and actually make it up the hill unaided.
The run up this hill was unbelievable the support was incredible, really incredible. Loads of people had stayed on to support. It was a great feeling.
As I crossed the line and laid down so I could er have my chip removed, I opened my eyes to find one of my companions laughing and saying “you got chicked on the line” Which considering how often I’d been chicked on the run, made me piss myself laughing.
The Aftermath Total time 6hr 05mins
The times are all a bit vague as there were transition times shown on the results and I'm not sure where they would be from anyway so I've just taken them from my garmin (recorded but not displayed)
My lack of running really showed on the 2nd lap, I’ve got about 5-6 weeks to get something in place to get me through IMCH, but reality has set in. I know how tough this is going to be now. I’d rocked up to this thinking, it’s ONLY a half, I’ll be fine. Well for the record, a Half is fooking hard work, really, really hard. If you underestimate it, take it too lightly or go off too fast you are in for a world of pain.
It was chip timed, a nice tech tee, medal, as much cake as you could eat (which is quite a lot). Very well run, great event that I would would highly recommend.
I didn’t catch up with Ian, but I know his preparation wasn’t the most straightforward, I’ve seen the results and know he finished, although it looked as though he had a tough race, well done fella, hope you’re not broken.
And I've got to agree about the support on the run up the hill - it was inspiring. 
Not what I hoped for, but probably what I deserved.
. Swim + T1 was 39:14.
approx 20 minutes later I hit the buoy - having at one point been passed by what I initially thought was a torpedo, but was actually the lead girl moving faster than I've ever seen anyone move in water. And that was against the current 
It was a far from rapid T1, and I was out onto the bike in about 6 minutes.
The first lap came to an end, and back up Everest to transition - with the helpful marshal at the finish gate ready to wave me in, but I took the right gate, rather than left... and straight back into the portaloo. By this time the sun was out it was heating up, and I'd got sweat streaming down my face whilst sitting there in what was turning into a rather fragrant oven, and the salt that was in my hair from the swim was getting into my eyes and making it all a rather painful experience. 